Why does everything Pluto says sound so fishy?
And now that I think about it, he occasionally reverts between casual speech and that divine, lofty tone.
...I suspect he's secretly a thug or an underworld criminal leader or something like that.
He brought out the second piece of equipment:
"Bone Saw," he called it.
A two-edged, large saw the size of a person. Though, he held it up like it was some cigarette.
…Now, I don't know if the saw was made FROM bones or if the saw was meant FOR bones.
Apparently, it could shrink and even grow bigger according to the user's will.
And what's more—he asked me to give it to Alicia.
That child abuser!
Sure, the girl has a lot of magical energy, but apart from that, she's just a normal human girl. (I think. I hope.)
I didn't want to argue with him right now, so I just accepted it.
...Maybe I'll sell it when I get to Pison.
"Hey, you're not going to sell any of these divine equipment, right?"
"What a mean thing to say, Lord Pluto! I would never!"
When he was done awarding the upfront trophies—he was enjoying himself—I decided to ask him what had been on my mind all this time:
"HOW IS A WOLF SUPPOSED TO USE A SWORD, LORD PLUTO THE SMART?!"
Pluto was taken aback by my outburst.
"H-How dare you?!" He pointed at me. "Do you know how much I spent to get this equipment from the black market?!"
...Jeez, at least purchase them authentically, with receipts!!
Pluto seemed to calm down a bit and begrudgingly agreed.
"Fine... Actually, you're right. And you can't just do assassination jobs and espionage for me in that dumb dog form."
Assassination jobs. With the "s."
I thought I was assassinating one person?
Not that I thought I'd succeed, but still.
His true colors are showing.
Pluto continued. "And if you're spotted by a Champion or an Apostle? Oh, dear God, 'meat-paste' won't even begin to describe what you'll become. They'll turn you into a shower of blood."
"Hahaha, You're saying some really ominous things about my future casually, though." I voiced, in slight—not so slight—panic.
Pluto brought out many odd alternatives for camouflage, which I shot down mercilessly, but we finally came to a consensus.
"Okay, let's just give you a human form." He casually stated.
"Eh? You can do something like that?" I exclaimed, genuinely shocked.
"Hold up! I think you're forgetting who I really am here. It's a bit annoying."
Oh, yeah...
He's supposed to be a god of death, or something.
Pluto nagged about how I hadn't been giving him "appropriate respect" for two whole minutes.
Then, with a flick of his wrist, I suddenly levitated a few feet off the ground.
Next thing I knew, my bones started to reorganize.
And let me tell you—
It. Was. Painful.
But of course, Pluto just stood there, flashing that crescent-shaped grin of his—He was enjoying the show.
A god of death, indeed.
In just a few seconds, the transformation was complete.
I looked down at myself—
And froze.
…A woman?!
A naked woman with long red hair, red eyes, and a body that—CENSORED!
…No. No, no, no.
Why are my hips and thighs so weighty?!
Why is my chest so massive?!
Why do I look like some demon queen in a bad fantasy novel?!
"HEY, PLUTO! WHY DO I LOOK LIKE THIS?!" I roared.
Pluto grinned way too lecherously. "Ehehe. It's fine! You're cute as you are. Just appreciate your new form."
No. No, I will NOT.
"NO! I'M SUPPOSED TO BE A CONQUEROR! A MENACE! A PRINCIPALITY!" I bellowed, my former deep, vibrating voice completely at odds with the feminine disaster standing before Pluto.
"Ugh, fine, fine." Pluto rolled his eyes.
Then, just like that—
The red hair shortened and became black.
And the breasts and hips and—CENSORED—disappeared.
I looked myself over again.
"...So?" I asked.
"So what? I did as you asked."
"I know, but I still look... feminine somehow..."
My rear was still kind of... erotic—
Wait, why am I noticing that?
"And these thighs are still... off..."
Pluto face-palmed.
"You uncontended anti-feminist! Alright, fine! I'll let the thighs go. But you're keeping the cute face and slender body. No muscular rubbish for you."
"IT'S MY BODY. MY BOOOODDDYYYYY!"
"Hey! Don't make me turn you into a mole demi-human!" Pluto snapped. "Just shut up and be satisfied with that form, will you? It's to my l-liking."
…Oh, no.
What does he normally do to the female human souls he captures?!
And he seemed dead serious about the mole thing, so...
Yeah.
I lost.
…Is it just me, or does this story have it out for me and my happiness?
"Now... we need to do something about my Trump card..." Pluto exhaled, casting a glance at Alicia.
...Huh?
Why was he calling her his Trump card?
This bastard better not be scheming anything with her.
She's my responsibility now, and I intend to keep her safe to the best of my abilities.
"What do you mean, Pluto?" I asked, warily.
"'Lord Pluto,' you meant, right?" he corrected, acting like a smug noble.
"But I'm saying this human (?) girl's magic is eating away at her vessel. Look."
As Pluto pointed at Alicia, I turned to look—
Her body was slowly cracking like dried desert ground.
Oh no.
The magic she released earlier… It was so massive that it's threatening to burst out on its own—!
"No… I… I have to do something?!" I panicked.
"Aha! Right!" Pluto suddenly snapped his fingers. "I think I know just the thing to save her!"