The silence was louder than any noise.
I woke up the next morning and instinctively reached for my phone, hoping—praying—for something. A text. A missed call. Anything from Sebastian or Evelyn.
Nothing.
The ache in my chest was getting familiar now. Heavy and constant. Like I was carrying a weight no one else could see.
I dragged myself out of bed, washed up, pulled on a hoodie and jeans, and wandered into the kitchen.
Empty.
No note. No breakfast. No sign my parents even remembered I existed. Honestly, that was probably for the best.
"Good morning," Mehusa said gently when I passed her in the hallway.
I smiled weakly. "Morning."
She frowned. "You seem... a little off."
I couldn't tell her the truth—that I was worried sick about people who weren't even technically mine to worry about.
So I just shrugged. "It's my parents."
She nodded sympathetically. "I'm always here if you need to talk."
I mumbled a thank you and walked out the door.
School was a blur. Sebastian, Evelyn, and Luke were still missing. No explanations. No signs. Just absence. I tried not to let it consume me, but every empty seat was like a gut punch.
Then, in the middle of third period, Carter stopped me in the hallway.
"Liv—can we talk?" he asked, his voice low, uncertain. There was something about the way he looked at me—like he wasn't sure if I'd say yes or scream at him.
I blinked. "Depends. Are you about to confess you've joined a cult or developed a sudden respect for Emily's fashion sense?"
He didn't laugh. Just swallowed hard. "Please. Just... a few minutes?"
I didn't say anything, but when he turned and walked toward the fire exit door, I followed. Stupid heart. Stupid curiosity.
The cold air hit me as soon as we stepped out. Carter shoved his hands into his pockets, his hair falling messily over his forehead as he paced, like he was trying to find the right words and losing every battle.
"You're gonna wear a hole in the ground," I muttered, crossing my arms.
He stopped. Looked at me. And then—
"I don't know how to say this, Liv. I've been trying to talk to you all week but every time I see you, I—I choke. You look at me like I'm a stranger."
I bit my lip. "You are."
That hurt him. I saw it in the way his shoulders dropped, like I'd hit something he didn't want me to touch.
"I deserve that," he said quietly. "But... I need your help."
I blinked. "My help? I'm not exactly running a charity for ex-best-friends-slash-ex-boyfriends."
His laugh was dry. Bitter. "I know. I know I have no right. But I don't know who else to talk to. I... I can't talk to Emily. I like her, but she doesn't know this part of me. She wouldn't get it. But you... you always did."
I hated how my chest clenched. Hated how familiar that ache felt.
"I used to know you, Carter. I don't anymore."
He looked at me like I'd slapped him. But he didn't stop.
"I've been a mess. Liv, I—I'm sinking, and I can't even explain why. I keep messing things up. My head's all over the place. I don't sleep. I barely eat. I smile at school and pretend I'm okay, but I'm not. And I know I don't deserve your time, but I just... I needed you to know."
My throat tightened.
Goddamn it. Why did I still care?
I wasn't supposed to care about Carter anymore. He'd hurt me. He'd left me. When everyone turned their back on me, he had too. But still—here he was, broken and guilty and asking for help. And I wanted to help him.
I hated that.
"You shouldn't be with me," he muttered suddenly. "If Emily sees us—"
I raised an eyebrow. "Then maybe don't drag me to dramatic secret conversations in dark stairwells?"
He let out a helpless laugh. "I just... I needed to talk to someone who remembers me before all this crap. Before I became this... person."
"You think I don't have my own crap?" I said, softer now. "You think I'm not falling apart every damn day?"
"I know you are," he said, voice almost a whisper. "That's the thing. I see it. And I still... I still care about you, Liv. I don't know what kind of twisted mess that makes me, but I do."
I closed my eyes. Took a breath. Then another.
Because God, I cared too.
But I couldn't go back. I couldn't hold him up when I was barely standing myself.
"I can't carry your pain, Carter," I said quietly. "Not anymore. I'm barely holding my own."
He nodded, blinking fast. "I know. I'm sorry."
I started to leave, but his voice stopped me.
"I still think about us. All the time. Not just the good parts. The bad, too. The way I hurt you. I hate myself for it."
I turned back to him. Looked into those eyes—eyes that used to feel like home. Now, they felt like a memory I couldn't erase, no matter how much I wanted to.
"You don't get to break me and then come back when you're broken," I whispered. "You don't get to do that."
And then I left.
I didn't cry. Not this time. But I wasn't okay either.
As I walked back to class, my thoughts drifted—not to Carter, but to someone else entirely.
Sebastian.
The green eyes that made my heart stutter. The boy who could read me better than I read myself. The one I hadn't heard from in days.
I had messaged him again last night. Just a simple, "Are you okay?"
No response.
Evelyn, too. Nothing from her either.
The silence was louder than any rejection Carter had ever given me.
I drove straight to the café for my shift. It felt surreal walking in again after months. The smell of espresso and vanilla hadn't changed. The soft indie music in the background. The clink of mugs.
Asher Wells was behind the counter.
Great.
"Liv?" he said, blinking like I was a ghost.
"I'm here for my shift," I said flatly, tying my apron.
"Wow, I didn't know you were still on the schedule..."
"You never asked," I replied, brushing past him.
He hovered for a second before leaning against the counter. "Look, about school—"
"Not interested."
"Liv, come on. I didn't mean to ignore you back then, it was just—"
"I really don't care, Asher."
His face fell. "We used to be friends."
"We used to be, yes," I repeated, eyes fixed on the coffee machine. "But now? We're just strangers. Strangers who used to share the closing shifts and stupid inside jokes about Karen-level customers."
Asher exhaled, leaning forward slightly. "Liv, I didn't mean to drop you. I was just—"
"Scared?" I cut in, finally looking at him. "Embarrassed? What was it, Asher? Afraid the cool crowd would revoke your lunch table privileges if they saw you talking to me?"
"I didn't know what to do," he said helplessly. "You pulled away first."
I laughed—short, bitter. "No, Asher. I didn't pull away. I disappeared because you stopped seeing me. There's a difference."
He opened his mouth, but I held up a hand. "Don't. Just—don't make this some misunderstood tragedy. You made a choice. You chose to pretend I didn't exist in school. Now live with it."
He flinched, but stayed silent.
I hated this. Not just him. The conversation. The timing. The fact that he was here when the only people I wanted to see weren't answering their phones, weren't showing up, weren't... here.
My chest tightened.
Sebastian.
My eyes drifted to the wall clock. 6:57 p.m.
Still nothing.
"You okay?" Asher asked quietly.
No. I was drowning in silence. I was checking my phone every two minutes like a lovesick idiot. I was spiraling every time I pictured Evelyn's face before she ran off, pale and terrified. And I was scared—really scared—for all three of them.
But I only said, "Peachy."
He looked like he wanted to push, to ask more. But my apron was tied, the rush was starting, and I was done giving him energy he never earned.
I turned back to the counter. "Coffee orders are on the board. You work here, remember?"
He stared at me for a second, then nodded slowly. "Yeah. Got it."
Asher stepped back into line like a scolded puppy. But not before whispering, "I really am sorry, Liv."
I didn't respond.
Because I didn't need sorrys. I needed Sebastian.
And for now? I had neither.
The rest of the shift passed in a blur of lattes and hollow conversation. I kept checking my phone. Still no messages. No call. Nothing.
When the shift ended, I couldn't go home. Not yet.
So I drove to the beach.
The beach air was salty and heavy that evening, carrying with it a strange kind of loneliness I couldn't shake. I stayed there longer than I should've—until the wind started to nip at my skin, and the stars blinked into existence above the waves. It was quiet. Peaceful. But still... empty. And I couldn't stop looking at my phone.
Still nothing.
No message. No call. Not from Evelyn. Not from Luke. Not from him.
And so the days passed.
Next day I dragged myself through school like a ghost. My steps were automatic. My head down. I didn't even try to pretend.
Carter found me again—cornered me in the hallway this time, right by the lockers.
"Liv—wait—can we just talk?" he asked, his voice rough, like he hadn't slept.
I glanced at him. "We already did."
"No, we didn't. I mean... not really." He looked like hell—hair a mess, dark circles under his eyes, his hands twitching with nerves. "I'm not okay, alright?"
"That's not exactly breaking news."
"I deserve that," he muttered, running a hand down his face. "But, please—just five minutes. I don't know who else to talk to."
"You have Emily now. Or has the 'it girl' of the year lost interest?"
He flinched. "She doesn't know me like you do."
"That's because you never let her," I said flatly. "You didn't even let me know you when it mattered."
"Because I was scared, Liv," he burst out. "Scared of what everyone would say. Scared that being with you would... ruin me. I was such an idiot."
"You were," I agreed. "But it's too late for all that, Carter."
He stared at me, guilt making his shoulders slump. "I know. I just— You always knew how to pull me out of the dark. And I'm—I'm so far in now, Liv. Please."
His voice cracked.
And for a split second, I saw it—the boy I used to like. The boy who made me laugh when things at home were unbearable. The one who held my hand during my first panic attack.
But then I remembered how easily he let me break. How he turned away when I needed him most.
"I'm sorry, Carter," I said quietly. "But I don't have the energy to save anyone right now. I'm trying not to drown myself."
I walked away.
Brad and Stacy were back at it—louder than ever, as if trying to fill the void left by the silence around me.
"Oh look, it's Olivia the loner again," Stacy sneered. "Did your imaginary friends ditch you too?"
"Maybe they found out she's a bad omen," Brad said. "Everything she touches turns to crap."
I kept walking. Didn't flinch. Didn't stop.
And that rattled them more than any insult ever could.
"That's right, walk away!" Stacy shouted. "You're so pathetic it's boring now."
But I didn't turn around. I wasn't going to give them my tears anymore.
Friday morning.
The ache had become a part of me now. A dull throb behind my ribs that refused to fade. My eyes burned from sleepless nights. My fingers twitched constantly, reaching for a phone that never lit up.
I'd texted Evelyn again. Left a voice message for Sebastian.
Still no response.
By lunch, Carter had approached me twice—each time looking more lost, more desperate. I avoided eye contact, offering him nothing.
At this point, I didn't know if I was more worried about him... or about how numb I was becoming.
I sat alone at the edge of the school courtyard, watching the clouds roll by. The wind tugged at my hair. The world kept spinning.
I hated it for doing so.
How could everything just keep moving when they were gone?
In the evening
The sky was painted with streaks of orange and pink when I found myself driving—no destination, just the urge to move, to escape the walls of my empty house and the echoing silence inside my chest.
And then I stopped pretending.
I needed to know.
I couldn't keep waiting like this, wondering if something had happened, wondering if he was okay, if Evelyn was okay, if Luke was okay.
There was only one place I could go.
The one place Sebastian took me when I was a sobbing mess, shaking and cold. His safe place. Their safe place.
Luke's flat.
I gripped the steering wheel tighter.
If he wasn't there, at least I'd know I tried. If he was...
God. I didn't even know what I'd say.
But I had to try.