"We cannot rely on hoping nothing will happen because in the past nothing had happened. It's best we get ahead and stop them before he stops us. Of course I can never expect a woman to understand politics. In that sense I do wish you were more like your sister, and the queen who understand reality of things," he went on.
"I see," I responded.
My father always used the same argument. That he had to do this. That if he didn't, another wolf pack would. That it was a cruel world and a situation like this was inevitable, but did it really have to be like this? I felt like he was lying to me. Actually, I knew he was.
Unfortunately, I didn't know what the world was like before my father's raids. So, I couldn't confirm without a doubt that the inevitable reality the spoke of, was true. I could only speak on what I had seen and what I had seen wasn't great.
"Anyway, I have work to do so you can go now," he then said, letting me know he wanted me out of his office. I had been waiting for this moment so I immediately left his lounge and made my way to my quarters. My father's and I's conversation was on my mind as we walked away.
When I was much younger, I used to believe the things he told me without thinking critically as I was just a child. He would always tell me that other wolf packs were aggressive, greedy and dangerous that if we didn't defend ourselves, we would be attacked and lose everything. He said we needed the resources he took from the territories because there was a scarcity.
Even the way slaves were treated, he had a reason as to why it was necessary to treat them this way. I was completely oblivious to it because of the things my father had told me. He said they were part of the enemy that wanted to attack and kill us and so they had to be treated like that.
It was when I witnessed a raid that I began to doubt everything he told me. It's when I saw that the other wolves weren't the aggressors but my father who was the aggressor. That wolf pack seemed to have been peacefully living before my father disturbed their peace and took everything from them. The Alpha was begging my father for mercy and my father mercilessly killed him.
From that moment on I began to do research on everything my father had told me about. I did research on the continent, the resources it had We had far, far more than we needed. So, my father was lying about needing all these resources.
All it was, was greed on my fathers' part. He was just greedy and wanted everything for himself. We didn't need all this.
Even though to this day he still told me we needed all the resources.
I returned to my room afterward and patiently waited for the night to come. I couldn't wait to continue working on my ointment now that I had more ingredients.
I passed the time by doing my usual activities of being pampered by the servants. I would rather not of course but I had to play along with what my father wanted until I could escape.
At dinner I went to the dining room where, the queen and my sister were present. My sister and the queen glared at me as I sat down. They had done the same at lunch and breakfast. There was still tension among the queen, Elodie and I from the day before. I mean there always was since they didn't like me but today it was even more than usual. My father wasn't always present for meals since he was busy working and would eat in his office.
As usual a massive feast was laid out before us on the table, that we were not going to finish. The slaves didn't have access to proper food and water and yet I always had a massive feast I could never finish at mealtimes. And the leftover food was going to be thrown away afterwards. The slaves were not allowed to touch it.
I ate in silence as usual whilst Elodie and the queen spoke to each other, completely ignoring me. Mealtimes were always lonely for me. When my father could come for meals, I would talk to him, but I wouldn't call that a conversation. He would tell me things he wanted me to do.
I wanted to feel bad that I had no one to talk to but looking around the room I would very quickly put those thoughts away. Surrounding the dinner table were the servants ready to follow any orders we had for them. They looked hungry and depressed. I may have had no one to talk to but at least I had food I reminded myself.
After dinner I returned to my room and was prepared for bed. The servant who had asked me for help was among the servants that tended to me. I saw she was still emotional and wanted to ask how her brother was doing so far. Maya was keeping a close eye on us though she was still upset about the situation the night before.
Once I was prepared the maids had left I rushed to take out my materials to begin experimenting again.
I just needed the correct mixture, the right measurements. Having replenished my supply of ingredients I began to re-mix them trying out a new formula. From my last attempt I knew I was very close. I couldn't make any mistakes as a wolf's sense of smell was quite sharp and so the ointment had to be perfect.