"There has to be food in here... right?" Suzuki's voice cracked as her eyes darted across the dungeon walls.
"Right? ...RIGHT!?"
Her breathing quickened, panic rising like a loading bar stuck at 99%—stubborn and mocking.
Just then, the system dinged and flashed a new notification.
[Inventory Unlocked]
— Iron Armor x1
— Wooden Hunting Bow x1
— Arrows x34
— Wooden Staff x1
— Elven Ranger Attire x1
— Blue Robe x1
— Healing Potions x10
— Bread x2
— Meat x15
Suzuki stared at the panel in silence.
"…You couldn't have told me that sooner?" she snapped, hands on her hips.
She rifled through the items, grabbing a chunk of meat and munching it mid-grumble.
But then, a far more dangerous question hit her.
"…How do I deal with the crushing loneliness in here?"
Her gaze drifted to the sealed dungeon exit—the glowing barrier reminding her she couldn't even go outside to scream into the void.
Another ding chimed, and the panel changed again.
[Goal Completed: Stop Incoming Adventurers]
[Reward: Goblin Lord Transformation]
"Goblin… Lord transformation?" she read aloud, blinking.
"…Better than nothing, I guess."
She brushed the dust off her clothes with dramatic flair, then spread her arms wide.
"Transform!" she shouted.
Silence.
"Uhhh…?"
Suddenly, a cloud of bright white smoke burst around her.
When it cleared, standing where Suzuki once was—
was a Female Goblin Lord: tall, ripped, and radiating pure RPG protagonist energy.
Clad in rugged leather armor, gripping a massive greataxe, and looking like she stepped out of a high-budget fantasy trailer.
[Dungeon System Interface – Character Information]
Name: Suzuki Naomi
Title: Goblin Lord (F)
Level: 2 → 15 (From Transformation)
Health: 300
Mana: 8,000 / 8,000
"Whoa… level 15 just like that?" she marveled, flexing one of her new, beefy arms.
"And I look… jacked?!"
She quickly summoned a mirror with Edit Terrain and stepped in front of it.
"…Holy crap."
What stared back at her wasn't the grotesque goblin boss type she'd seen in her game dev days.
No—this was a 7-foot tall, dark-haired, muscular, hot-as-hell goblin goddess.
The kind of raid boss players simped for.
"And this greataxe? Just chef's kiss—ties the whole look together."
She slung the axe over her shoulder, admiring herself with a wicked grin.
"So this is what it's like not living off Monster Energy and emotional damage," she giggled.
Then dropped flat onto the floor.
"…God, my old life was such a disaster."
Silence.
Then manic, unfiltered laughter.
"BUT WHO CARES! I'M NOT STUCK LIKE THAT ANYMORE!"
She laughed, practically bouncing with joy—so much so that the entire boss room shook from her excitement.
The slime and goblin shaman, watching from the corner, clapped awkwardly. It wasn't every day their boss radiated this much chaotic energy.
Then Suzuki turned to them, still grinning—until the reality hit her like a brick.
"Right… the loneliness," she muttered, her smile fading.
Her gaze drifted back to the dungeon's sealed exit, beyond which lay rolling green fields and the warm glow of sunlight. It almost felt like the world itself was mocking her from just a few meters away.
She let out a long, tired sigh and stood up.
"Ugh… guess I'll just 'progress' or whatever the system wants."
Ding.
Another notification popped up—perfectly timed, as always.
[New Goal: Reach Dungeon Level 2]
[Reward for Completion: Usable Exit]
She stared at the panel, deadpan.
"…Do you have to wait until I'm at my lowest to give me the most important information possible?" she groaned.
[?] :)
Suzuki blinked.
"Was that…nevermind?"
She raised an eyebrow, then chuckled softly to herself.
"Well, I guess I can talk to you in the meantime," she muttered. "Not like I've got anyone else."
Talking to my own system... she thought.
Hey, at least it's unique. And if all those isekai stories I've read are right, maybe I'm secretly chatting with some god or goddess pulling the strings.
That thought alone made her smile—genuinely, this time.
Then she slapped herself. Hard.
"Get a grip, Suzuki!" she groaned, face heating up. "This is exactly how weird anime girls end up marrying rocks."
She looked around the dungeon, exhaling deeply.
"Welp. I guess it's time to actually start designing this place for real."
First, she got to work—clearing the rubble from the spike trap and drying out the soaked floor left over from the last fight.
"Alright, where do I begin...?" Suzuki muttered, placing a finger on her lips, deep in thought.
A moment passed.
Then her eyes lit up.
"No, no basic stuff… Let's make this hellish for anyone who dares enter!"
A wicked grin spread across her face.
She summoned a new room just before the boss chamber—spacious, dimly lit, and filled with promise.
"Now… a little bit of this, a little bit of that..."
A giant pit formed in the center, with only a narrow path leading across.
"That's for anyone who skipped leg day or fails their balance check."
Then came the real pain.
Three massive swinging blades emerged from the walls, slicing through the air in deadly arcs. Suzuki added four elevated ledges at the corners, each manned by goblin archers ready to rain pain on any who dared inch forward.
"Perfect."
[Spent: 5,000 Mana]
She wiped imaginary sweat from her brow.
"And I've still got 3,000 left to spare. Look at me being all resource-efficient!"
Suzuki admired her handiwork with a satisfied grin.
"Well…"
Her smile twitched slightly.
"I may have completely ripped off Zen's Bastion from Black Spirits…" she admitted, eyes drifting to the ceiling.
"That cursed dungeon... I still wake up sweating from that hellish location."
She chuckled dryly, as if the trauma still lived rent-free in her head.
"Even now… the memories haunt me."
But the room?
Absolutely brutal.
And she loved it.
[Dungeon Level: 1 → 2]
She grinned at the system panel, her eyes gleaming.
"Of course mimicking FormSoftworks' idea of fun would power up the dungeon. Sadism really is a viable strategy."